April 2nd 2016 – Tabula rasa

This entry comes after a shocking realization that left me longing for a lesson to be learned from the experience.

As I watch the beautiful sun rise from my window, I realize: This is a new beginning. A new day. A fresh start. I can start over. Tabula Rasa – a blank slate.

I don’t need negative energy in my life. As I move forward in life I will continue to meet new people, create lasting bonds. Explore new experiences. Life is beautiful and it is what I make of it.

I can’t continue to allow people to hurt me. I can see the light in people all I want, but I can’t continue to think that I can magically brighten that light in everybody. As much as it hurts me to let go of these people. Some forever. Some for a few years. Some for a few months. People do change. However, they need to change on their own. Maybe the very act of stepping out of their lives will be the catalyst to help them realize their own light, for themselves.

I can only show them the path, I can’t drag them down it kicking and screaming. That takes too much energy from me. If they want me to, I can walk down that path with them, but they have to make that choice. They have to choose their own path. They have to pick up the light and illuminate their own path, I can’t be the only one holding the torch.

My heart radiates all the light I need to illuminate my own path. So I’m going to hold my head up. Proud to walk the path I have chosen. If I should cross paths with them one day then we’ll see where that goes. Only time will tell. Maybe one day our paths will merge. Maybe we’ll just pass by each other. All I know is that nothing can stand in my way. I will continue to keep moving forward.

This was a tough one. A hard lesson to learn. One that I continue to learn in new ways.